I feel like I have this sign on my back or this huge neon sign flashing “Come Abuse Me” or “Here’s Your Target” with an arrow pointing at me.
If there was a crowd of 999 good people to choose from and 1 bad person, I would pick the one bad person every time.
Do you find yourself saying or feeling something similar to this on more occasions than you care to admit? What if I told you that there is a good possibility that you really do have a flashing sign on your back…spiritually speaking?
While we all experience situations where we seem to come out on the short end of the stick, there are some people that seem to experience the short end much more often than others. They often refer to or see themselves as victims. If we take a look at the definition of victim, Webster’s dictionary describes a victim as an individual injured or killed by disease or accident; a person cheated, fooled or injured; a living being offered as a living sacrifice. Those that experience this on a repeated basis may be dealing with supernatural forces that are attracting these circumstances which then develops a mentality to keep the cycle repeating; a victim spirit and victim mentality.
A victim spirit can be seen in finances, relationships, vocations and ministry. A victim spirit always settles for less, has little or no joy, often feels dishonored and disrespected, and isn’t able to walk in the honor or fullness that is God’s desire. He may ask us to voluntarily lay our life down in situations, but He does not desire for anyone to take your life or to “suck the live out of you”.
The victim spirit creates a mentality that causes an individual to unknowingly attract abuse to them which then creates the feeling that their life, dignity, respect, or honor is being taken from them. The victim spirit can also be generational and pervade entire families and even cultures. I see this spirit at the root of many headlines in the news today.
How Do I Know I May Be Dealing With A Victim Spirit?
You can have a victim spirit in varying degrees, but there are common signs or indications that it is in operation in your life. Not all of the following will necessarily apply, but people dealing with a victim spirit often:
- Attract dishonor everywhere they go; people who are normally gracious with others are drawn into taking cheap shots at them.
- Criticize or dishonor themselves with an inner correcting voice.
- Apologize for and own another person’s unhappiness or pain even though that person’s unhappiness or pain is usually not their fault.
- Lack joy – they have no joy, nor any hope of having any, and they often don’t realize they have none. Suppress the pain with endless work.
- Reject all abuse but tolerate neglect.
- Can’t receive nurture, comfort or compliments when people offer it to them because they feel unworthy.
- Enable, meaning that the total mind set revolves around a co-dependence with the predator; they simply don’t think in terms of their being an independent person with value apart from being an enabler.
- Visualize the possibility of being in less pain if they become a better enabler.
There are also some tell-tale emotions that are prevalent in a victim spirit:
- They feel taken advantage of or cheated.
- They feel lied to or violated in some sense.
- They feel powerless or trapped to change the outcome.
- They also feel anger; some directed at the predator but mostly toward themselves for being a victim. Most of all they feel helpless that change can come.
While these emotions are valid and real because the experiences of being taken advantage of, cheated, violated, or abused are real. When this mindset takes control your life, you settle for mediocrity and results in you being angry, bitter and full of resentment.
The victim spirit causes you to settle for much less than what God has promised you. You will never walk in the dominion that God said you would walk in. But there is hope. God has given us the authority through His Son, Jesus Christ. Overcoming the victim spirit and that mentality is possible, which will change you from being dominated to having dominion. We will be talking about the process shortly.